A questionable way to start a conversation.

Previously - Annual Review 2025

Keeping this one fairly short and sweet.

This year's theme is Perseverance. Looking at the things we identified in our annual review, we're coping better with the big things at work, but still having some periods where the brain is just distracted.

We have helped out more critters, helped by an unexpected financial windfall in January.

We've got into 3D printing and actually created a couple of things rather than just passively watching YouTube videos. (Admittedly, we still have done a lot of research - and for other hyperfixations, they have been still more about passive consumption)

We're trying to read one book a month consistently, which so far we're sticking to.
(We're also trying for one non-quarterly/annual review article here a month, albeit running late with this month's).

We've finally reclaimed some of our lost time by deleting one of the gacha games we played daily... partially replacing the time spent with watching Star Trek - The Next Generation with friends instead, but at least that's with friends and it's still a comfort watch.

vancoufur

Prep for Vancoufur this time was a lot more chill - a lot more idea of the requirements of long haul travel, what worked for us last time, what didn't. Still some roughness with international travel (our body still hates jetlag)

What's interesting for us is what this has inspired. We attend Vancoufur because some of the creatures most special to us are spread across the Pacific Northwest but there's No Fucking Way we're entering the US for at least the next few years, possibly a lot longer depending on how long the current messes take to be fixed.

What VF sparked in us was wanting to perform in fursuit again - which probably means Confuzzled or ScotiaCon given that we can't really take our current suit on a plane. [1] But also the interest in 3D printing has us wanting to figure out what we can maybe do with TPU for something lighter weight or to at least have something with us. We printed out some claws for VF this year, even if them being a little too small/sharp to wear with our attempt at scaling them up meant we mainly just had them on in the therian panel.

With Confuzzled, we do need to be careful. In 2024, we ended up... overdoing things a bit, along with then having the stress of trying to put our normal amount of effort into Furality which was a week or so afterwards. But I suspect Furality will be a quieter affair next year if their age verification policy remains in place making us less inclined to put as much effort into that - and we know the critical mistake we made in 2024. [2]

But anyway, given that Confuzzled is sold out for this year, that kind of thing is a year away. Maybe we do start trying local furmeets, though we've had our reasons for avoiding them that weren't just social anxiety.

Anyway, those are a while away, so...

the next 90 days

We list this every time, but it's still true - we still want to look more visibly queer more often (though since we've still failed to dye what remains of our hair, we're going to wait on that now until we get the passport updated). We're legally on HRT now, hoping to get finasteride at our next check-in, we've got an appointment for laser that hopefully will not be delayed again, and maybe we'll get over some of our sensory issues when it comes to makeup.

And. You know. Actually bring it or buy more when it comes to travelling.

We want to create things physically. Make custom 3D prints for ourselves and important people in our lives when appropriate. But also, if we do end up doing something fursuit related, we're probably going to need to remind ourselves on the basics of sewing, it's been a while, and we know there's work that needs doing.

We still struggle reaching out to critters outside of a group setting or a transaction. To some extent, it's years of internalized "speak when you're spoken to"...

And anxiety!

...but it's also the neurospicy thing of what do we even say? "Hey" or "how's the weather" or a Telegram sticker feel inconsequential. Talking about work often feels like a faux pas with furries (though admittedly, we probably should reach out to some non-furry former bosses at some point and see how they're doing). "How are you doing" feels acceptable every so often, but too often risks being overbearing or insincere (not helped by our dislike of work colleagues using it when they clearly Want Something). And launching straight into big conversations (or roleplays) doesn't feel right either.

Our social energy often feels geared towards being able to "yes, and" things, which I'd like to think we're decent at, but I still don't know how you learn to be the one that gets the ball rolling. And so it's another thing where we feel like we need some kind of guide to reach what appears to be a baseline for others. So that feels like something to focus on for a bit, rather than being in our own head all the time.

...also we should probably at least try and progress a couple of stalled projects before the next distraction comes in.

footnotes

  1. Curse our big head for meaning the fursuit head can't work as a personal item. ↩︎

  2. We don't drive. Confuzzled has several overflow hotels - some which are a 5-10 min walk from the main hotel by pedestrian intended paths - and one which is a 30 minute trek across multiple car parks and some paths which don't seem to be pedestrian friendly. That walk every day - combined with the lack of being able to easily retreat to a room other than the headless lounge to rest or recharge - fucked us up a bit. ↩︎